Monthly Archives: April 2020

The Italian Job
Directed by Peter Collinson
Written by Troy Kennedy Martin
1969/UK
IMDb link
First viewing/Criterion Channel

[box] Charlie Croker: It’s a very difficult job and the only way to get through it is we all work together as a team. And that means you do everything I say.[/box]

This was a very fun caper flick, absolutely perfect for Lock Down.

Charismatic Cockney criminal Charlie Coker (Michael Caine) is released from prison.  He is immediately on the hunt for next new job.  The mob murdered one of his cronies but his widow was left with an elaborate plan for robbing the Fiat payroll in Turin, Italy.  Coker breaks back into prison to get the backing of Mr. Bridger (Noel Coward), a gang leader that lives in palatial luxury there.  Bridger refuses, then changes his mind when he learns the Chinese are sending a large amount in gold to invest in a new plant.

This is not one of those movies where you get the planning stage or successful version before witnessing the flawed execution.  Instead, we get all of it as it happens.  The mob does not get any fonder of the revised edition.  The movie concludes with a spectacular chase scene in which all and sundry pursue red, white, and blue Mini Coopers through Turin and the Italian countryside.  With Benny Hill as a mad computer expert with an unquenchable lust for “big women”.

This has Caine at his most gorgeous and charismatic and showing his talent for comedy.  It also contains beautiful scenery, good jokes, and that exciting car chase.  It’s just a very, solid entertaining picture.  Recommended.

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)
Directed by Peter R. Hunt
Written by Richard Maibaum and Simon Raven from a novel by Ian Fleming
1969/UK
IMDb link
First viewing/Amazon Prime

[box] James Bond: [to the camera] This never happened to the other fellow.[/box]

Well Diana Rigg is the ultimate Bond girl so there is that, plus pretty Alpine scenery and some good action.  The movie kind of goes downhill from there.

While on vacation, James Bond (George Lazenby) saves beautiful Tracy Draco (Rigg) from suicide by drowning.  Her father, Marc-Ange, is a mob boss.  He wants Bond to continue to protect his daughter by marrying her. He says he will repay by revealing the location of Ernst Blofeld (Telly Savalas)  Bond of course is the world’s most marriageable bachelor and both he and Tracy are tentative at the start but they gradually fall in love.

In the meantime, Bond journeys to Blofeld’s alpine lair.  He learns that Blofeld plans to achieve world domination through experiments on beautiful women in his “allergy clinic”. Blofeld kidnaps Tracy and uses her as a pawn in the inevitable conflict to come.  All the regulars at MI6 are on the job.

George Lazenby has absolutely no twinkle in his eye, takes himself much too seriously, and has minimal acting talent.  A Bond film rises or falls on its Bond and this one was a dud.  The film is also at least 30 minutes too long for this kind of thing.  Still I’ve spent 2 1/2 hours in worse ways during Lockdown,

The song for the movie, “We Have All the Time in the World”, is the only one that does not share its name with the movie. It was the last thing Louis Armstrong ever recorded. He died a couple of years later. RIP Louis, the world is a poorer place without you.

Muhammad Ali, the Greatest
Directed by William Klein
Written by William Klein
1969/France
IMDb link
First viewing/YouTube

[box] I done wrestled with an alligator, I done tussled with a whale; Handcuffed lightning, thrown thunder in jail; Only last week, I murdered a rock, injured a stone, hospitalized a brick; I’m so mean I make medicine sick. – Muhammad Ali[/box]

[box] It’s not bragging if you can do it. – Dizzy Dean[/box]

The only time I watched boxing in my life was when Muhammad Ali fought.  I just loved to watch him dance around the ring.  So this was nostalgia and thus perfect for Lockdown.

The version that I watched spanned Ali’s career from his first heavyweight champion win against Sonny Liston in 1964 through the 1974 “Rumble in the Jungle” fight against George Foreman in Zaire.  We see highlights of several fights and classic Ali mouthing off as no one before or since.

The Beatles visit Ali’s training camp in 1964

Given the 1974 footage, the release date for this seems odd.  I can only assume that the color footage in Zaire was added later for a re-release.  I’m glad it was included as this part is particularly fascinating.   If you have any affection at all for Ali, this is a must-see.  If you weren’t born while this was going on, find out what it was all about.  Recommended.

The Oblong Box
Directed by Gordon Hessler
Written by Lawrence Huntington and Christopher Wicking from a story by Edgar Allen Poe
1969/UK
IMDb link
First viewing/Amazon Prim3
They Shoot Zombies, Don’t They?

[box] N’Galo: We have knowledge of things you know nothing of.[/box]

When horror movies are a suitable exchange for worry, it must be Lockdown.

The story takes place in 19th Century England or at least that’s where it settles.  The beginning takes place in Africa.  The Markham family has made a handsome fortune on the backs of Africans.  The elaborate opening sorcery/voodoo scene is quite intriguing.  Eventually the witchdoctor draws Edward Markham to the ceremony where he is made hideously ugly and insane by magic.  His brother Julian (Vincent Price) takes him home and locks him in the attic.  Julian then proceeds with his courtship and marriage to the much younger Elizabeth.

Edward’s lawyer Trench and the sorcerer come to England to spring him.  Unfortunately, their scheme accidentally sees Julian buried alive.  Julian once again escapes.  He forces local doctor J. Neuhartt (Christopher Lee) to shelter him while he carries out his revenge plans.

Well, the ending didn’t come as a surprise and Christopher Lee is wasted in much too small and straight a part.  But we do get Price who is always fascinating to watch and a bunch of the salacious and cruel set ups that are typical of this era of British horror.  Not great but quite watchable.