The Major and the Minor (1942)

The Major and the Minor 
Directed by Billy Wilder
Written by Charles Brackett and Billy Wilder; suggested by a play by Edward Childs Carpenter; from a story by Fanny Kilbourne
1942/USA
Paramount Pictures
First viewing/Netflix rental

[box] First Conductor: If you’re Swedish, suppose you say something in Swedish.

Susan Applegate: I vant to be alone.[/box]

Billy Wilder’s directorial debut is made with his characteristic panache but I found the premise vaguely icky.

Susan Applegate (Ginger Rogers) finally gets a job in New York City. On her first night as an in-home scalp masseuse, she is repeatedly propositioned by her randy middle-aged client (Robert Benchley).  This is the final straw and Susan decides to return home to small town Iowa.  She has saved the return fare in a sealed envelope but when she tries to buy a train ticket she discovers that the price has increased.  Broke, she disguises herself as a twelve year old to ride on the half-price children’s fare.

Conductors on the train find the disguise none too convincing and Susan slips into a sleeping compartment for shelter.  Surprisingly, the occupant Major Kirby buys Susan’s age hook, line and sinker leading to a number of risqué situations in which he tries to put Susan into bed with him to calm her fears of thunder, etc.

Kirby takes Susan to the military academy where he works as an instructor and is engaged to the very single-minded daughter of its commandant, Pamela.  He refuses to let Susan ride home alone, so she is subjected to the unwanted attentions of the teenage cadets.  Susan is put up in the room of Pamela’s kid sister Lucy (Diana Lynn) who is immediately wise to the ruse.  Lucy is willing to keep the secret, though, since she has little use for her sister and is trying to fight Pamela’s efforts to keep Kirby at the academy despite his desire to go on active duty in the army.  Lucy and Susan, who is falling for Kirby, team up to try to get him his wish.

There is nothing per se wrong with this highly rated film.  Rogers, in particular, is excellent. She might even pass for a precocious twelve-year-old.  The trouble is that she often acts more like a six-year-old.  The other problem is that there is something that just seems wrong with using a twelve-year-old’s age to get away with a bunch of double entendres, however witty.  Otherwise, I would say go for it.

Trailer